Friday, June 20, 2008

Stupid ideas - The City of Buckhead

I love it when I get to use my "Stupid ideas" tag, and rarely has it felt so appropriate. Eternal crank John Sherman and his Fulton County Taxpayers Foundation wants Buckhead to secede from the City of Atlanta.

Barring the fact that it would never in a million years pass the legislature or a referendum, just how would this new city work? Well, I'm glad you asked, because once you hear the answer you will surely agree that this is not a half-baked idea:
Supporters say cityhood would allow Buckhead homeowners to pay about 60 percent less a year in property taxes. They base the estimate on the average property tax rate of the new Fulton County cities, all lower than Atlanta's.

They also contend that homeowners would no longer pay property taxes to support the city's school system.

The supporters envision a city of about 85,000 residents, with children educated in private schools or new charter schools. The city government could be run by a company, they say. Milton and Johns Creek are managed by the consulting firm, CH2M Hill.
Basically, its a magic city. No taxes. Or services. I mean, what could 40% of the level of taxation possibly provide to an area changing as rapidly as Buckhead?

Schools? Who needs them. Everyone in Buckhead goes to private school anyway. Huh? What's that you say?
Atlanta Public Schools Superintendent Beverly Hall was surprised by the suggestion that Buckhead could leave the Atlanta system, noting school officials are having to create more classroom space to meet the rising enrollment in the area.
Socialist.

Also, it is great to know that they really researched this thoroughly before proposing it. Aside from not having proposed anything as pesky as boundaries, there is also that matter of the pre-existing city of the same name:
About 60 miles east of Atlanta, in Morgan County, is the town of Buckhead, population 222.

"You wouldn't have that cache," said Massell, saying Atlanta's Buckhead must change its name if it became a city.

"I'd hate to see that," said Sherman, unaware of the other Buckhead's existence.
Even I knew that - that dude from American Idol was from Buckhead, GA. He sang the crap out Queen that one night. Get with the program, man! The median age for American Idol viewers is 42, so no excuses.

Thank goodness every legitimate Buckhead civic leader panned the idea immediately.

But hey, while we are playing Fantasy Island, I've got a great idea for the new Mayor of Buckhead - that dude with the animal head telling all the little animals the story of Buckhead. That little squirrel can be Council President.

I think this is the first nominee for Stupidest Idea of the Year. Other nominees are encouraged, but John Sherman has set a pretty high bar. You are welcome to submit ideas that came out of this past session at the General Assembly, though. Post in the comments so we can all join the mockery.

2 comments:

  1. As an objective and astute member of the Capitol press corps, I hold my tongue as to what willy-nilly ideas came from the statehouse.

    But I think the idea of having that little squirrel serve as council president is genius. Absolutely genius. Would the Buck be required to wear clothes?

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  2. I'm pretty sure that the Buck in that photo is nekkid. I'm equally sure that he's asexual. So who needs pants? I certainly don't have an issue with it, as long as he doesn't try to raise taxes...

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